As a clinical social worker practicing seventeen years now (ten of those in private practice), I am faced with counseling teens regarding the hook-up culture on a daily basis. I find it particularly striking that girls often seek power and acceptance through this behavior.

One Mother said the following to me after reading her daughter's journal, "It's like woman's lib gone mad! Don't these girls know that acting like boys doesn't make them equal to boys?"

In fact, she was hitting on a point. Many girls that I speak with feel as though they are equaling the score, so to speak, by having casual sex with guys. "After all" one teen told me, "they get power from putting a notch on their bedposts so why can't we?"

The truth is, I have never met a girl who was happy about her decision to hook up. Most say that they feel dirty and guilty after their brief encounters. Often I hear stories of extreme fear that 'someone will find out' about the encounter and a gossip trail will begin.

Many teens today seem not to know that women and men are already equal under God and the law. We don't have to have multiple sexual partners to prove this point. As a matter of fact, I often point out to girls the fact that they have actually given up one of the first rights they ever had with men... that is to say no to sex. Even Scarlett O'Hara had the right to tell Rhett that she was done with children and wanted a separate room. He was pretty upset with her, yes, but he respected her wish.

Ironically, chemicals may be partly responsible for women finding themselves waiting for that call the day after that never comes. The same hormone that stimulates milk production after birth and cements bonding between the newborn and her mother is also released in women during sex. This could be partially responsible for the bonding women can feel toward their sexual partners... even those that last just one night. So yes, we are equal... but different.

Although there is pressure on both women and men to join the hook-up club, I believe that women largely have the power to control the spread of this ever growing downward spiral of cultural depravity. It starts by joining together and remembering how powerful we are without giving ourselves away. It continues with less and less women making themselves available for casual sex. We can turn this cultural trend by insisting on getting from relationships what we have the right to get (and the responsibility to give)... love, respect, commitment, fidelity, communication, and partnership, just to name a few key goals of a healthy relationship.

I have no doubt that the author's survey was a fair representation of the campuses she included. As a former evangelical, I also appreciated the points she made regarding evangelical schools. I'm also sure that those Catholic schools that make an authentic effort to be faithful to the Magisterium and the spirit of Catholic moral teaching like the Catholic ones listed at This site would also offer a safe haven from the hookup culture.

Jesus asks whether he would find faith on the earth when he returns. Whether people will choose to question the lies when confronted with the truth. How can we expect young people to respect legitimate authority when we as "mature" adults pride ourselves on how superior our moral compass is compared to the outdated morality of Jesus Christ as given through the Church? Young people enter college with their belief in love intact. But parents are more concerned with their material success, stressing that sex before marriage could ruin their future plans (so use birth control?) but fail to tell them how it will diminish their ability to truly love - and set them on a path of spiritual deception and destruction. Does this sound too overbearing? How many parents would soft-peddle drinking and driving or Russian roulette? Sin kills the soul. The problem is as old as Adam and Eve, we'd rather believe the lie that makes us important than the truth that makes us good.

So while I find the author's data as immensely valuable, I respectfully suggest that her analysis may be limited by her own unwillingness to believe that sin is actually evil - that it actually and seriously damages both the sinner and those that are sinned against. The result is that we have a morality that may be gentle but is definitely not loving.

Our solution to the problem of a hookup culture is not found in inventing new ways to reach young people (as the Evangelicals endlessly do), but in understanding and communicating the singular truth - one that every devout Evangelical knows in part - that God loves us and has a wonderful plan for our lives and that Truth subsists in the Catholic Church.

As a current Catholic college student who attends a West Coast Jesuit University, I feel that this article does not paint an accurate portrayal of Catholic College Students.
I highly agree with the definition and mentality of college but also high school students who "hook-up" quite frequently. I also agree that there are not a lot of Catholic books and authors out there who write about such topics. However, as I read his article, I feel the need to speak up for the young adults who are not ignorant of the Church's teaching from John Paul II on the Theology of the Body.
In fact, there are so many popular Catholic authors out there, including Christopher West, Mark Hart, Todd Lemieux, Jason & Crystalina Evert, Mary Beth Bonacci, and Thomas Morrow.

I greatly appreciate the thought put into this very relevant matter, the conversations which stemmed from your teachings, and the avenue that was opened because of your students, studies, interviews, and articles.

Having attended an all women's college, the 'liberal' arts attitude of acceptance was stressed. After one convocation about Censorship, (which entailed an open discussion with a group of 35 students, professors, and artists) I got the most out of one professor's comment which addressed reverse discrimincaiton on our campus. Discrimnation of the conservative view and acceptance of the liberal veiw, particularly on the topic of sex and sexuality, are typical attitudes of openness that students are asked to adopt. It is very important to note that these attitudes do stem from administration as much if not more than students.

Overall, there is much to be gained from having an open forum to air questions and concerns about dating vs hook-ups. In my experience there is much guilt associated with 'hooking up,' and finding an avenue (aside from Confession) to air these concerns, express the hurt, and overcome the behavior has proven difficult. If campus ministries, collegians, and Church leaders find a way to provide students & young adults with the enviornment, resources, and support needed to change the hook up culture please share them with me.

May the Lord continue to bless your work, Donna, as well as ALL those who share in its ministry.