You might be a Catholic if…

Over at Loyola Press, Paul has a blog listing some of his own "you may be a Catholic if…" jokes. The idea inspired us at U.S. Catholic and we've gathered some of our own. Add your ideas, too!

You might be a Catholic if…

…you jockey for the pews in the back of church.

…you actually remember who your patron saint is.

…you include your Confirmation name when people ask you what your full name is.

…you understand that the church, like an ocean liner, is not built to change direction speedily on contentious issues, and you know that overall that's a good thing, even if it means you probably won't see certain changes in your lifetime.

…you feel at home when you enter a Catholic church in another country even if you have little idea what's being said.

…you secretly calculate the length of Sunday Mass as well as how long the priest's homily lasts, and you rejoice when they find a way to move it along a bit.

…you know someone you think would make a good bishop.

…you say a prayer when you hear a siren wailing.

How would you complete this sentence? Add your ideas here:

About the author

Megan Sweas

Megan Sweas is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles.